Forever Traumatized

I’m a fan of scary movies. Granted, I’m always the one in the theater with my feet up on the seat, hiding behind my knees and whispering to the person next to me “Tell me when it’s over.” Afterwards, I go home and run as fast as I can to my bed because I don’t want any murders to get me. We all know blankets are the best form of protection. No one’s gonna get me if I’m safe in my bed! So realistic.

It’s funny because I can watch really gross stuff, but some of the most tame things can frighten me. Every now and then certain scenes from movies or TV shows will register with me in such a negative way that I won’t be able to ever erase them from my memory. A lot of the time they aren’t even scary. They’re just super bizarre and my brain can’t take it.

I’m going to share some music videos that have slightly disturbed me over the years. Laugh all you want, but just know that my dreams are being haunted.

Don’t Come Around Here No More – Tom Petty. This is a great song. But I simply cannot deal with a real life Alice in Wonderland turning into cake and being eaten by a Mad Hatter Tom Petty. In no way is that right. Tom Petty’s face is scary enough already. But when he’s in an oversize outfit and drinking an abnormally large tea, I just feel uncomfortable.

Land of Confusion – Genesis. Everything about this makes me want to throw up on Genesis. Why would they put these images in my head? First of all, puppets are scary as hell. Just no. The only thing I can stand puppets in is the movie The Labyrinth. Only because David Bowie’s greatness (barely) negates the atrocity of using puppets as actors. The only thing worse than one puppet, is hundreds of puppets. And that’s basically what Land of Confusion is–a lot of puppets. Which genius thought of that idea? A world full of puppets is what I imagine hell to be like. Jim Henson is clearly messed up and has absolutely no friends. Jason Segel is unfortunately following in his footsteps. I thought there was hope for him. But nope. He’s doing weird Muppet movies, so now he’s on my list of questionable people.

Tonight Tonight – The Smashing Pumpkins. There are things about this music video that I appreciate. I love the song. I also like that they’re paying homage to one of the first movies ever made, A Trip to the Moon (1902). Yeah, that’s right, I took Film Crit. The moon in both the movie and the music video is one of the scariest things I’ve ever seen. Hands down. A blurry, old-fashioned Billy Corgan and crew play their instruments lethargically in the night sky, outlined by stars. There is honestly no other way to describe it.

The lead couple in the video journey to the moon and are attacked by moon imps. They end up  jumping to the bottom of the ocean where they’re attacked by a fish and eventually saved by Poseidon (or Neptune if you’re Roman). The whole thing is just too much for me to handle during this delicate stage in my life.

I’m sure there are an insane amount of creepy music videos. But these really make me cry inside. Has anything that you’ve seen freaked you out lately?



24 thoughts on “Forever Traumatized

  1. Well, if MTV was still in the business of showing music videos I bet there would be plenty of new and scary stuff to sit through. I always thought Nirvana’s song, “Heart Shaped Box” was sort of demonic feeling. “I wish I could eat your cancer when you turn black…” Yeah, okay… that’s a nice image. Thanks Kurt Cobain for that offering. (actually it’s sort of a cool song.)

    Tonight Tonight reminds me of driving up the mountain on the way to Utah State University. Good mems.

    • Yeah, I mean, people still make videos but they aren’t as popular anymore. These are the videos that have been around for a long time that I haven’t been able to forget about. I vaguely remember a music video where someone takes a baby out of a stroller and walks away. What video was that? So scary! Can that actually happen?
      Tonight tonight is such a good song.

  2. I’m convinced Tom Petty inspired Tim Burton’s version of Alice.
    But Land of Confusion? That’s just fun!

    And Billy Corrigan is scary enough to put the devil off his feed, no matter what Billy is doing.

    • I think you might be right about Tim Burton! Seriously though, Land of Confusion is so scary! I usually don’t mind Billy that much, but when he’s scary, HE’S SCARY.

  3. I can’t watch the videos when at work which is a bit pants.

    I do like the appreciation of David Bowie in The Labyrinth though. His hair and ‘package acknowledging’ leggings are a sight for sore eyes.

    • Oh yeah that sucks. You should just start blasting a music video and see what happens. Fired? Maybe. Lots of fun? Definitely.
      David Bowie’s leggings in Labyrinth taught me everything I needed to know about the male anatomy.

  4. I feel the safest when I’m under my blankets, lying on one side and covering the ear of the other side :). It’s a bit hard to do that in summer, but okay.
    I’m also quickly scared by movies… Black Swan…. The Grudge… I have seen only small parts of it, because I was hiding. So freaky!

    • I haven’t seen The Grudge all the way through! I might have to go back and revisit it! I feel like Black Swan and The Grudge have a lot of jumpy scares. Which are fun, but I like more creepy movies. Although, in Black Swan whenever she was clipping her nails I would FREAK OUT. So gross when she peels that nail all the way back. Ewwwwww

  5. OMG we are the same person. The Tom Petty one used to freak me out. The part when he eats the cake and it’s Alice? Holy shit that always made me sick.

    The part in Black Hole Sun when they roast the Barbie always made me sick too. When the little girl’s mouth starts to foam with the ice cream…I remember watching that in 1994 thinking I would never enjoy music. Now Soundgarden is one of my favorites. I still probably can’t watch the video.

    One thing on puppets, marionettes (sp?) are the worst. I hate those old Christmas films with the puppets. I remember in one there was a nun with a big pointy nose. I really wanted to throw up. The same goes for the actor that played Tiny Tim in the black and white version of A Christmas Carol. His nose was huge and I remember the commercial for it on TV. I literally couldn’t eat any more of my dinner.

    • Ahahahah! Okay I’m seriously freaking out about Black Hole Sun. I had never watched it before and that’s EXACTLY the kind of thing that I’m talking about. My mom was like, “how do those things scare you?” They don’t scare me I guess, but they’re seared into my brain and they make me so uneasy!
      Hahaha about A Christmas Carol. Little things like that make me not want to live on this planet anymore. So frightening SO glad you know what I’m talking about though. .

      • I’m thinking there was some newborn baby formula available to the public for a brief time period at the end of October 1987 and our mothers were two of the purchasers. Perhaps it was put out by the government to create a Universal Soldier? Could explain how talented we are.

      • That seems like a better explanation than mine. I just keep thinking our moms are long-lost twins and turns out that we’re long lost cousins or something. I just want to have a long lost relative.

  6. Pete Howorth says:

    I don’t like scary things.

    “But Pete, you’re well ‘Ard.”

    True, but I’d prefer comedies and action over films like Hostel where I have to watch someones eye get cut off with a blow torch.

    • How did you know that my response would be “But Pete, you’re well ‘Ard.” Sounds just like me.
      Omg the blowtorch eye scene in Hostel freaked me outttt.

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