P0wning N3wbs

The Worst Job In The World

I over exaggerate a lot. It’s not the worst job in the world. But it’s the worst job that I’ve ever had. Mainly because it’s one of the only jobs I’ve ever had. Telemarketing. Phoning people and asking them questions. Trying to sell them something. Getting hung up on. It all just really sucks and makes you want to die.

My thoughts when being hung up on.

Some corporation called me the other day telling me that my long distance calls would only cost 2 cents from now on. To which I replied, “Oh great!” Little did I know, my response would enable them to sign me up for some other type of bill. I didn’t even agree to anything, they just worded it in a confusing way which obviously tricked my small brain. Some kind of sorcery if you ask me. I told the guy over the phone that I had to go even though I hadn’t finished his questions. He started yelling at me. “No! You can’t go. You still have to tell me your email!” Click.  I realized that I’d already told him too much.

He called me back a little later asking for my email and I told him that I didn’t want the service that he was selling. He got really upset and hung up on me. Like a little girl.

I remember working at a call center. It’s literally the worst job. I worked next to my friend and we would talk between our calls. Once someone answered the phone we would put on our fake voices at lightning speed.  I hated everything about that place. I hated calling people and disrupting their day. I hated being hung up on. I HATED using the military alphabet. ‘V’ as in Victor? ‘I’ as in I hate you so much.

Tell me how much you hate yourself after you say 'P' as in Papa.

Sometimes people would be really cool and answer all of my questions. In fact I seem to remember telling someone I loved them. I think the call center recorded some of the calls so they probably thought I had Tourette’s or something. Others would tell me that they couldn’t talk because Dancing with the Stars just came on. Decent excuse. One time I called someone named John Lennon. “Hello is this John Lennon?” That kind of thing doesn’t happen too often.

I quit after about 3 weeks. It wasn’t too strenuous, but I just hated taking time away from someone’s day. I try to be polite when telemarketers call me, since I know what life is like on the other end of the phone. But it’s just so tempting to yell at them. Or tell them that no one loves them.

What do you say to telemarketers that interrupt your precious down-time?