All You Can Eat Taco Night

Paul and I had been dying to go to this restaurant’s All-You-Can-Eat Taco Night. It’s held every Monday and we finally remembered to go yesterday.

The establishment is called Pluto’s. I think it used to be a gas station once upon a time. Now it’s just a really weird purple building with neon lights. Their tag line is “The hottest food from the coolest planet” or something super clever like that. The food is decent, nothing amazing.

The one and only.

We’d eaten there once before and the record for most tacos devoured was 16. That’s not too bad, but nothing special either. I’m not really one to talk. I ended up only eating 6 tacos in all. But to be fair, I had burritos for lunch so I actually could have had maybe two more, which would have left me at a total of 8. We noticed that there was a new record to beat. Some kid ate 28 tacos. We inquired about him. The waitress said he was a short kid, maybe 20 or 21. He stayed for 3 hours eating tacos. Paul and I kind of felt like that was cheating. 3 hours is a long time. He might have even gone to the bathroom during that time, which would also be cheating in my book.

I really wanted Paul to beat that kid. I know he could have too, but by the time he got to his 20th taco, the restaurant was closed. He didn’t want to keep the waitress and staff there for that long, so we left. If we go back, I’m certain he can break the record. I just want the guy who ate 28 tacos to be really upset. YOUR TACO EATING WAS ALL IN VAIN.

Just to be clear, I had mine without cheese or sour cream because both of those items freak me out.

Have you ever been in an eating competition? How many tacos do you think you could eat? Should Paul go back and try to beat the record?

 

The Oasis

This is not a mirage.

I’m not referring to a lush spot in the desert where you can rest your dehydrated head. And no, I’m not talking about the annoying British bros that seem to lack any self-awareness. Here in Illinois, if you’re driving on the highway and feel like you’re about to kill someone because you desperately need Panda Express, you’re in luck. Every so often you’ll pass a raised bridge of goodness situated above the clouds road. It’s basically a glorified rest area that cars are able to drive under. Keepin it classy in Illinois. This, my friends, is an Oasis.

The Oasis that I’m familiar with offers a lot of delicacies such as: Sbarro, Taco Bell, KFC, Subway, Panda Express, Auntie Anne’s, Starbucks, and a Travelmart. Today my mom and I stopped by Sbarro and both got a slice of cheese. I felt complete after that.

The great thing about the Oasis is that when you sit and eat your weight in grease, you can watch the cars drive underneath you. It’s so romantic.

The people that work there always look like they’re on the verge of suicide. They have massage chairs located by the restrooms so I don’t know what they’re so upset about. There’s also one of those kiosks with people selling phone covers. What more do you really need in life?

The Oases (betcha didn’t know the plural of Oasis!) are great because they allow tired drivers to relax in a food court-type setting and re-evaluate their lives. Have you ever stopped at one of those side-of-the-road rest stops? Everything is usually made of wood–the drinking fountains, the toilets, the vending machines, etc. They seem like they should be the setting for Texas Chainsaw Massacre or something of the like. Whereas the Oasis could be the setting for Supersize Me 2. Did that movie really turn people off from eating McDonald’s? It just made me want french fries.