“You’re So Vain” and other events.

Last night I had trouble sleeping. I never have trouble sleeping. Sleep is my thang. Here in Victoria, we don’t need AC–we just leave our windows open to get a nice breeze. Last night however, I got less of a breeze and more noise.

The apartment behind us, where our windows face, was playing music extremely loud starting at about midnight. One would assume they would be playing party music or some kind of top 40 crap, but no. Carly Simon’s “You’re So Vain” started playing on repeat. Needless to say, when I woke up there were definitely clouds in my coffee.

After that, ELO’s “Evil Woman” came on followed by an entire ELO Greatest Hits album. I think someone from my building shouted at the late night DJ but that only made them repeat whatever song they were playing. They wanted no interruptions. Maybe they were going through a tough break up and were choosing super appropriate songs and then got distracted by how many good songs ELO has to offer. By the time “Living Thing” came on, I had the shut the window and turned on the fan.

Today Paul took me to lunch after I was done volunteering. We went to one of our favorite Thai restaurants. I always get this red coconut curry stuff that’s super bad for me but tastes like a tapestry of wonder on my tongue. I mainly like to go there because of one of the waitresses there. She’s very androgynous-looking. She’s always so happy and willing to get whatever Paul and I need. Occasionally she calls me “sweetie” and I kind of love it.

Paul: She never calls me sweetie.

Me: And that’s why she’s my favorite.

Paul: That’s good because she’s right behind you.

Me: *mouthing in her direction* I love you (As she turns back into the kitchen)

As I walked home from eating my weight in spring rolls, I saw a girl with a “leminade” stand. Of course I had to purchase a cup to quench my thirst. The little girl wasn’t totally willing to pour me a cup so her mom did the dirty work. I glanced down at the prices and under the list it said “made with love” so I had to ask, “This isn’t by any chance made with love is it?” The mom laughed. The kid did not look at me. Can’t win ’em all.

A Post About Nothing

I haven’t been feeling very inspired to write anything recently. Sometimes I feel like I’ve talked about everything there is to talk about. Sometimes I can’t even remember if I’ve written about a certain topic already or if I just dreamed that I did.

These days if you have writer’s block (or any kind of block at all really) you go onto Google and see what there is to write about. I typed “what should I blog about?” into Google, clicked on the first entry, and this is what it said:

1. What is your expertise? Readers want to read about what you know and your special experiences. Really!

Okay, geeze. I believe you. Problem is, I don’t have an expertise. Unless you count being able to name every Pokemon an expertise, I’ve got nothin. Are most people experts in a certain area? Is this some sort of life requirement that I missed out on? Should I look into something? I guess history would be my expertise because I got my degree in it, but we all know that’s a lie and I forgot everything I learned right after the final exam.

2. What’s the news? While you don’t have to necessarily be a news breaker, you can give your view on what’s happening in your industry and how it relates to your hobby, life, etc.

Am I supposed to have an industry? I don’t even know what day of the week it is, never mind what my industry should be. I feel like I break the news occasionally, but I usually sway towards celebrity gossip more than newsy news. Can we call it newsy news from now on? The reason I didn’t write about the newest celebrity news is because my heart is broken and talking about it just makes it hurt more.

I’ll give you a hint: It has to do with these two.

3. What is your personality? Do you like to take a stance? Are you funny? Do you like being a contrarian? These insights can help you to write about your topic.

Can’t I just be everything? Why do I have to choose just one of those things? Can’t I be a funny contrarian that likes to take a stance? Maybe I don’t want to be defined by one personality type. I think there are sides of me that are soft and kind and other parts that are funny and playful and other parts that are deep and thoughtful. Notice how I didn’t name any character flaws? It’s because I don’t have any, in case you’re wondering.

4. What are your hopes and fears? Things that you can’t stop thinking about or what keeps you up at night could be good things to share with others.

I would say one of my hopes is trying to live a good solid life. A life I can look back at and feel proud of. A lot of the time I get caught up in trying to make other people proud, but I think I should just be focusing on making myself proud. I try to be the best example to others that I can be.

My fear is that I’ll go to a restaurant and they won’t have my favorite thing on the menu anymore. This scenario has happened to me multiple times and it’s scarred me for life.

5. What are your hobbies? Things that you like to do on your free time are often great topics to discuss.

Um let’s see here. Sleeping is a big hobby of mine. Eating is also another big one. Going online. Driving and listening to music. Walking and listening to music. Just listening to music in general. Traveling to new places. Did I say eating? Um petting soft animals. Laughing at people. Laughing at myself. Not exercising. Shopping. Painting my nails (but only when they’re grown out). Going to movies. Eating popcorn. Eating chocolate. Eating.

I think that’s about it.

Were those prompts supposed to solve my writer’s block? Because I think they made it worse. And they made my self esteem plummet because I don’t have an industry or an expertise.

I guess technically you can’t have writer’s block if you’re not a writer, so I probably have nothing to worry about, right?