Stressed But Well Dressed

You know those cutesy little framed quotes meant to hang in your kitchen that say “Stressed is just desserts backwards!” Yeah, I hate that. It’s like, okayyy so if I eat a brownie my stresses are just supposed to flutter away? If anything, I think that would add to the feeling of being overwhelmed. Oh great, now I can’t eat dinner because I had a stupid brownie because this sign in my kitchen basically told me to.

I’m really just overreacting. I started nannying full time-ish and I’ve found that I have no time for myself, no time to clean, and no time to workout. I just want to sleep forever. How do people have kids and read books? Or have kids and write blog posts? Or have kids and vacuum? I honestly don’t understand. I don’t even have children of my own and I’m finding it hard to fit everything I want to do into one day.

Me, after work.

I do like the whole earning money aspect though. And sometimes, okay a lot of the time, the kids are pretty cute. And I’ve gotten an avalanche of compliments on my gold sparkly TOMS after hanging around playgrounds so much. They’ve been referred to as “princess shoes,” jus’ sayin’.

So no, it’s not all bad. One of the terrifying things though, is when the parents of other children on the playground think I’m one of them. “NO!” I want to scream. I’m going to look wayyyy more ragged and tired when I have kids. The fact that I could already pass as a parent scares me to no end. Also, I would hope that my future children would somewhat resemble me. How can people look at these kids with huge brown eyes and thick hair and assume I’m their mom? Does not compute.

I digress. If you haven’t seen me around the blogosphere lately, this is the reason. But I’ll try to pop my head in every so often to see what’s up. Is anything stressing you out lately?

A Day Out On The Town

I did something today that I haven’t done for a long time. I went shopping. I used to go every day, and now I go every other day. Just kidding. I actually hadn’t been for a while because I’m in this weird stage in my life where I try not to spend money. I know, gross.

When I was an avid shopper, it was easy to stay in my own little world and just focus on the clothes and myself. I was a little rusty today and kept observing other people and the ridiculous things that were being said by common folk.

The following are real quotes said by real people and my responses (if I actually had the guts to say them out loud) along with some of my inner thoughts and struggles.

At H&M

Girl shopping with her grandma: I like these dresses.

Grandma: Yes. Dresses are in this year.

Me: You know what else is in this year? Pants. And shirts. And clothes in general.

At Joe Fresh (I know, wtf?)

Employee: How are you doing today?

Me: Fine thanks. How are you?

Employee: I’m good, thanks! It’s kind of cold in here.

Me: Yeah you should probably quit.

At Forever 21

Me: Ughhh.

Me: This would be too small on me.

Me: This would be too short on me.

Me: This is too pink.

Me: This is…wait what is this?

At H&M

Mom with her daughter: Hey this would be cute! [holds up a sparkly black mini skirt]

Daughter: UGH not for festivals!

Me: Um you should listen to your mom, she knows what she’s talking about and could really fix your whole look. If you consider what you’re wearing “a look”.

At Forever 21

Me: I need these shoes.

Me: No.

Me: Yes I do.

Me: You need food, water and shelter.

Me: And these shoes.

Me: Then you have to throw out a pair at home to balance your life.

Me: When did I make that rule?

Me: Yeah wtf that rule sucks.

Me: Unlimited amount of shoes, right?

Me: Right.

Me: But then if I buy these I’ll have to wait in line and talk to someone.

Me: Unnecessary purchase.

At Joe Fresh

Me: Hi, do you have these in a darker denim?

Employee: Hmm no, I don’t think so. But we have them in red!

Me: Oh, okay. That’s the same.