Lily in England Part Deux

This will be the obvious second installment of Lily in England. Too many observations, too much judging. One post simply cannot handle it all!

Entertainment:

The thing that really bothered me the most about living in England was that I felt like I was cut off from the rest of the world. Movies would come out months later than in the states. I would find myself having to wait for films that I was desperate to see, meanwhile they were old news back home. Canterbury one had one theater and it only had 2 screens! What kind of 3rd world BS is that? Just not acceptable!

Futbol, “footy”, soccer, whatever you want to call it–it’s taking over England. I don’t get it. It’s just people kicking a ball around. But every night the pubs would be full of men watching, cheering, and passing out. Am I missing something? Speaking of drinking, it’s disturbing how much people drink there. At first I thought it was all fun and games, but seriously England, take a look at yourself. I don’t think anyone knows what alcoholism is there. It just doesn’t exist. People actually looked at me funny when I told them that someone I knew was an alcoholic. Every morning I would see puke and broken bottles on the cobblestone.

Pub culture is an important part of life. Once a week there would be a “pub quiz” which is just a string of trivia questions for groups of people that come to the pub. It’s costs money to play, and whichever team wins, wins all the money. It’s pretty fun, but I never won 😦

Dancing at the clubs was always an adventure. A lot of people didn’t make it as far as the clubs though–most ended up collapsed on the sidewalk. Baa Bars (one of Canterbury’s finest) was 3 levels. The bottom level would play alt-rock, the middle floor was rap and the third floor was what they would call “cheese”. I’ve come to understand that cheese is pop music, but I guess, only the cheesy songs? I mean, they played S Club 7 sooo my assumption is probably not far off.

I took this picture myself, actually. Just a normal night.

Style (Or lack thereof):

England had possibly some of the worst dressed people I have ever seen. I’m not a fashion goddess by any means, but come on people! Whoever said that London is 10 years ahead of the US in terms of fashion must have been taking crazy pills. I mostly hung around the cool, savvy chicks that went to my college, but there were a lot of people in Canters and London that seemed to not have the slightest clue how to dress. One scary trend that I noticed for guys was gelled up hair, and combed down bangs (or fringe). In what way is that cute?

I can't even.

Stores would close at 5pm every night. Except Thursday, when stores would stay open EXTRA LATE until 7pm. Like, is this some kind of sick joke? Night shopping is one of my favorite activities. Stores should always be open until at least 9pm!

Chavs:

Chavs chavs omg chavs. Chavs are the U.K.’s equivalent to what we would call wanksters. They’re usually wearing Adidas tracksuits, missing some teeth, smoking and drinking simultaneously, and pushing a stroller, or walking a Rottweiler.  They wear a lot of knockoffs, which unfortunately stopped me from sporting Burberry. It’s tragic, really. These people scare me a lot and would always come up and talk to me for some reason. They are definitely a colorful type of people.

Lady Sovereign is a perfect chav. Sporty Spice also is a good one. She should have been Chavvy Spice.

The Motherland

Looks a little too much like England.

Canada still maintains a lot of its British roots. I guess since they’re part of the Commonwealth Canada feels the need to celebrate their British-ness all the time. But why would you want to be proud of being colonized? I think England tried to turn it into a good thing–“Hey guys, remember when we totally took over your country? Well, now you get to be a part of our cool Commonwealth club! But don’t be fooled by the name, you won’t become wealthy for joining.”

Canada only became independent in 1981. 1981. Ummmm. But it’s weird because England still adores Canada. Whereas when everyone fled to the US (in 1607) to gain independence, England pretty much disowned us. Well, we disowned ourselves. But still, in Buckingham Palace, there’s a Commonwealth display and Canada’s as prominent and totem-poley as ever. They also have a huge “Canada Gate” outside of the Palace, and a memorial statue with maple leaves on it in Green Park. Its like, OKAY WE GET IT, CANADA IS YOUR LOVER.

Apparently, Victoria has the most British influence out of all the Canadian cities. This doesn’t surprise me. They love fish and chips here. LOVE. I wish they would just refer to them as fish and fries to make it less traditional. But nope. They also have lots of pubs. I actually prefer pubs to bars, but I’m still not okay with it.

There is a lack of 1 dollar bills here. And by lack, I mean they don’t exist. They use equivalents to the 1 pound and 2 pound coins. And trust me, they will weigh you down. It’s pretty obnoxsh.

At lets not forget how they spell certain words. They include the unnecessary “u” in colour, favourite, savour, etc. Why make words longer and more creepy?

Oh and they don’t have presidents. They have Prime Ministers much like their motherland. And Parliament buildings (which I guess means they have a Parliament?).

What really makes me think that they are trying way too hard is that they have double-decker buses. It’s like, really?

Oh, and it rains a lot. So even their weather is a copy.

Remember when Will and Kate did their Canadian Tour and they thought Canada was so cool? That was weird. Who are they trying to fool? Kate had some good outfits, but it didn’t salvage the fact that she had to spend a week here. She seemed like she didn’t get the big deal about Canada either. I’m pretty sure we’re soul mates.

When it comes down to it, I think Canada needs to decide if they’re their own “independent” country or if they’re a mini-England (not geographically speaking, obvs). Canada needs to just be Canada and embrace all of the weird things that they do. When you start taking someone else’s traditions and characteristics then you lose your own distinction. Get with the program, Canada.