Kate’s Mistake

I think we’ve all heard about Kate Middleton’s topless photos by now, haven’t we? The reason it’s a big story is because, well, that’s not how a princess should act. At least in my opinion.

Here’s the scoop, Kate and Wills were on vacation in France and a photographer snapped some pictures of the couple while Kate was topless (to be fair, William was topless too!). The photographer gave the pictures to the French tabloid, Closer, and they were published for all the world to see. William was livid and took action, suing Closer for their nice spread of Kate’s boobies.

Kate, your boobs are EVERYWHERE.

Many people would say, “Isn’t Kate allowed to be topless on her private vacation? She’s only human!” Yes, she is allowed! But if she wants to be seen in a certain, professional and royal light, then she has to watch herself when she forgets to wear a top. Not to sound harsh, but it’s no one’s fault but Kate’s. Look, I’m all for Kate having fun and living it up. But she should know by now that photographers are everywhere, professional, or not. She will always be one of the most photographed people ever, and if she thinks that she can take off her top and no one will be the wiser, she is sorely mistaken.

I don’t think it’s fair that William and Kate took action against the magazine. After all, they were only doing their job. If you don’t want to be featured in scandalous pictures, don’t invite scandal. If you don’t care, then be free! Go topless! And bottomless for that matter.

You know what they say, curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought him back. So I decided to find the pictures, because I wanted to be fully informed on the issue. What a disappointment. If only Kate would put on a little weight, then she might have some crowd-pleasing breasticles, but alas, her slight frame proved to be a letdown. Perhaps that was the reason that William was so upset? He didn’t want everyone to see Kate’s invisible boobs?

Kate may be royalty, but now I have a one-up on her. Or maybe a two-up?

The Majestic Maple

In all it's glory.

The other day my mom decided that it was about time to talk about the Canadian maple leaf. And when my mom decides something, it will happen.

She inquired about how the maple leaf is often used as a logo more than a symbol. It is (as I have recently found out) used on many restaurant chains, fliers, websites, etc. Paul was saying that the maple leaf makes people happy. Its the equivalent of saying “American Made”. I don’t know about you, but I prefer all of my goods  custom made in Chile. But that’s just a personal preference.

My mom also made another good observation–a maple leaf is really hard to draw. I’m not sure aboot Canada, but in the US, elementary schools force kids to draw American flags every year for one reason or another. Stars and stripes are pretty straight forward. A maple leaf though? Forgettaboutit.

Although, my mom said that she admires the simplicity that is the Canadian flag. She described the red as “bold and crisp”. And, while I do agree with her, I think saying that is super gay.

Let us not forget the many flags that include the color blue: USA, U.K., France, Australia, Norway, Cambodia, Chile, Cuba, Czech Republic, Faroe Islands (obvi), Iceland, North Korea, Laos, Luxembourg, Nepal, Netherlands, Panama, Puerto Rico, Russia, Samoa, Serbia and Montenegro, Slovakia, Slovenia, and Thailand. To name a few.

How many flags are only red and white? Canada, Austria, Bahrain, Denmark, Georgia, Greenland, Indonesia, Japan, Latvia, Poland, Switzerland, Singapore, Tonga, Turkey, and Peru. These countries may all have life and liberty, but they are missing the pursuit of happiness. And I’m pretty sure that’s illegal.

Lastly, my mom asked what kind of leaf the USA would have on their flag. Lets just be clear–the USA would not pull that kind of ridiculousness with something as permanent and symbolic as a national flag. But if I had to choose, it would probably be an Oak leaf because that’s our national tree apparently.

And now it's perfectly clear why our founding fathers decided against the whole leaf idea.