Here’s the Mail, it Never Fails

When I was younger, I always looked forward to getting mail. Something about having an item addressed to me seemed so important and professional. I just loved it. Hell, I still love it. Most of the things I obtained were not of importance and they definitely were not of any professional standard. But they still made me happy.

One piece of post that I knew I would get without fail was my American Girl catalog. Hours of entertainment came from that bad boy. Their pages had so much for me to peruse–dolls, Bitty Baby, accessories for said dolls, clothes that I could buy to match my dolls–it was endless. I’m pretty sure I bought some of the most useless crap of all time from the catalog. But then a magical thing happened. An American Girl store (Rightly named The American Girl Store) opened in downtown Chicago. Now, if I remember correctly, I was in 5th grade when it opened so I was on the border of I should not be wearing this stuff and I have no friends anyway because I’m home-schooled so it doesn’t really matter.

I think I looked pretty chic in my red vinyl jumper.RedJumper

I also looked forward to birthday and Christmas cards. The correct way of opening any card was to first rip the envelope open, preferably in the worst way possible. Just destroy it. Once it’s discarded, hold the card in your hand. Do not read it, I repeat, do not read it. Just simply turn it sideways and hope that money or a gift card falls out. I would even settle for Geoffrey Dollars out of desperation. If none of these items were included in your card then you obviously had a family member who hated your guts and wanted you to be miserable.$(KGrHqF,!q0FJh!Den+KBSZ,kEvzzQ~~60_35

The scariest thing that would come in the mail were report cards. In elementary school we would just take them home with us in our backpacks and give them to our parents. They obviously trusted us more when we were 7 more than they did when we were 16. Granted, our grades were made up of E’s and S’s so no one (not even our parents) really cared about those.

In 6th grade, once they started mailing them to our homes, is when the anxiety set in. You had to find a way to intercept that card from getting to your parents first in order to know what kind of mood you were going to have to deal with. Mine always ranged from A’s, B’s, and C’s so my parents didn’t really care too much. But occasionally my grades would slip in math and science and a D would get sent home. YIKES.

Basically, getting mail was like a box of chocolates. You never knew what you were going to get. And it usually didn’t involve money.rtt-new


24 thoughts on “Here’s the Mail, it Never Fails

  1. I LOVE getting mail. Like, LOVE IT!!!
    In fact, when I was in college I signed up for a bunch of free catalogues JUST so that I would always have the greatest mail coming to my apartment.
    Mail is great. It seems that these days all I get for mail is stupid bank invoices and junk. Boo. Great thing about this time of year is getting cards in the mail.

    • Lol that’s pretty funny Sandy! I really like getting fun mail too. Like, cards and packages and magazines and stuff! For sure, the holidays prove to give us lots of cards!

  2. I love mail! I always (still do) get so excited when a package arrives. πŸ™‚ That’s the best part about online shopping…mail! And now I have that Blue’s Clues mail song in my head, lol…thanks.

    • Lol so true. It’s great that we can basically send ourselves gifts from online shopping! Lol I think you might be the only person who got the reference!

  3. unfetteredbs says:

    I’m kinda old school. I love sending mail. It’s fun to shop and buy cards and notes BUT I’m never flush enough to insert cash or gift.
    getting a note or card in the mail always makes me smile.

    I think we need a pic posted of you in your American girl doll outfit. My gals never got into them.

    • Me too. I love it now! I like sealing my letters with wax on occasion and I used to have a sweet seal but I don’t know where it is… 😦
      Lol thankfully there is no evidence of the outfit. It was the absolute worst. Your girls are smart ladies.

  4. I know what you mean about mail as a kid. I would watch all this stuff fluttering through the letterbox each morning and none of those lovely brown and white envelopes of loveliness were ever for me. Not fair.

    And my mum would always nag me about birthday cards too! “Aren’t you going to read the cards?”

    Read, no. Open, empty, and devour, yes.

    • Hah totally. I loved looking for things addressed to me in the mailbox and there was rarely anything. My mom would always make me call any adult that sent me a birthday card and thank them. Literally my least favorite thing ever.

  5. I gave up on Christmas cards when all they said was To and From and that was the sum total of my communication with that person for the year. I wanted news, I wanted a letter, even if it was one that went to everyone. Personal mail is a rare treat these days, but still a welcome one.

    • Omg I hate that! It’s so lazy when all they write is To and From! I used to love the letters sent from other families who had lots of kids. My family never wrote those, but we were kind of boring anyway so I guess there wasn’t any news to print!

    • This is true. There’s really nothing to look forward to. Every so often I’ll get a magazine from a subscription and it’ll be the best day of my life.

  6. When Ben and I were engaged, my aunt came to Chicago with my little cousin who was probably 5 or 6 at the time and we took her to The American Girl Store. Holy freakshow. That was a fun day for my husband.

    Thanks for linking up with us, Lils!

    • Lol The American Girl Store is the most insane place ever. Most of it doesn’t make sense to me. Like the fact that they have a tea room to have lunch with your doll. So necessary.
      Why thank you, for hosting such a fun topic!

  7. Aww, American Girl dolls. I had Kirsten back when they were all dressed up like boring Pilgrims (aprons and bonnets and braided hair). Glad to see they are sassing them up a bit πŸ™‚

    • Lol yes! I had pilgrim Kirsten too. And Samantha who looked kind of posh. I read their dumb books too. Oy. They are definitely sassing them up…well at least they were when I was 11.

  8. I laughed about the E’s and S’s grades when we were little. My daughter just started getting “real” grades this year, and it’s nice to finally know what the hell is going on and how she is actually doing. Before, one of the marks she could get was a (*) …seriously, an asterisk? What is that supposed to mean?

    • Lol that’s hilarious about the asterisk! That is so stupid. Come to think of it though, I had some S* and maybe some S-. Like, how can one achieve an S minus? I had skillz.

  9. Worse than report cards were progress reports. Luckily my parents had no idea those were mailed. They were a warning as to whether or not you were about to get a bad grade. I remember having a D in sewing class and being really upset so I hid it from my parents. So yeah, I wanted my parents to think I could sew well?

    • Ugh yes! Those were the absolute worst. I tried to forge one once and my parents caught me. Lolz. Hah so funny about sewing. I think I pulled off a B in Home Ec, but it probably should’ve been a D.

  10. And today the mail ALWAYS involves money, doesn’t it – either someone wants their money you owe them or someone wants you to give them your money for their stuff. Good memory recall for me on the report cards…had forgotten about that, but so so true. My D’s were usually English. Funny, Spanish A’s, English D’s. πŸ™‚

    • It always does! I hate all the junk mail–offers, flyers, dumb stuff. Hah yeah report cards were always terrifying! A’s in Espanol probably came in handy later in life!

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