Feelings

Yearning


In this vast world of blogging splendor, I’ve fallen and I can’t get up. There’s not enough time in the days, hours, minutes, for me to even contemplate ideas or have creative thoughts. I long for soaking up books, movies, plays, music, pop culture, history, news, reality, knowledge, etc, etc, etc. And I feel like I’m eternally chasing all of this stuff and the world keeps speeding up and producing more stuff and it’s just a never-ending production line of crap with some gems mixed in. tumblr_mifs9lp64Q1rrmf9ro1_500

I love when I find a gem. Like a favorite movie or TV show or painting or article of clothing or photograph–something that speaks to my soul. I can feel it. You can feel it. You just know, ya know? I feel like, as humans, we spend so much time wading through the crap to get to the jewels. Or sometimes we think that the crap is worth more than it is.

I went to a movie tonight called Begin Again (bad title) and I expected it to be bad because it starred Adam Levine and Keira Knightley’s teeth, but then I started digging it and then I was disgusted in myself. I started thinking, do I really like this? Or have I lost my superior (and obnoxious) sense of what’s critically considered “good” and “bad” and now I’m just a regular Joe enjoying an unrealistic rom-com. Maybe I was just in the mood for something light. But I don’t want to be that person. I want to be the person who watches foreign films on Wednesdays and knows the newest bands before the university radio stations. I want to have an opinion on the careers of models that people haven’t even heard of. Do I want to be a hipster? I don’t know. I liked myself when I was in-the-know. But now I’m out of the loop and I can’t catch up. One can never catch up on what they missed. You can’t study up on life.

I don’t even know what I’m saying anymore. Peace out. *drops mic*

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19 thoughts on “Yearning

    • unfetteredbs says:

      I’m with Michael on this one!!
      “I feel like, as humans, we spend so much time wading through the crap to get to the jewels”— fantastic summation my friend.
      You’re not missing anything, just being selective and that’s a smarter way. Say the lady that’s never been in the “know” or a hipster. Haa

  1. Angst is good for the soul. Go with it and remember life, even the boring and mundane, is a lesson, can teach us something about ourselves and that’s what it’s about. Peace out, Lily.

    • It is, isn’t it? Thanks Brigitte! I do like learning about myself–I think that it’s always important to embrace who you really are, even if a little weird or slightly boring and normal. Good advice!

  2. LOL!! I fell about 30-plus years ago. Your blog is one of those gems though! What a joy your writing is — like a fresh sea breeze in a ocean of stuffy rooms!

    My new addiction is comedian podcasts. So I feel a little tiny bit in the loop. For instance, I learned from one comedian podcast, that Paul Simon has an identical twin brother named Ed. Only Ed looks kind of like a chimp. (Youtube: Paul and Ed Simon) I felt so superior and loop-ish knowing that. I texted all my kids about it. It was a real Mom Has Some Info From The Loop Moment!

    • Aw thanks so much Linda! You’re too kind! Lol I love your compliment “a fresh sea breeze in an ocean of stuffy rooms.” beautiful stuff! Thank you, darling!
      Ahh I love comedy, but I haven’t latched onto the whole podcast thing. I’ve actually always wanted to start my own podcast…lol Paul Simon already looks kind of simian, so the fact that Ed is chimp-y doesn’t surprise me. I wonder if they’ll star in the new Planet of the Apes movies?
      I’m proud of you for being so in-the-know with that info! Thanks for keeping me in the loop!

  3. Miss your blogging. I’m in the same boat as you….trying to find the time and the creativity to write something down….when I’m feeling so hot and blahhhh.

    • Aww thanks Sandy, you’re so kind! It’s so hard when you have a job and family and just life. Blogging is fun, but you definitely need to be in the right mindset for it.

  4. And I feel like I’m eternally chasing all of this stuff and the world keeps speeding up and producing more stuff and it’s just a never-ending production line of crap with some gems mixed in.

    I get it. As soon as I have finished one book, there is four more I have to read, and of the four three will probably be a waste of time, plus the two I just read reviews about that sound interesting, its the same with films and music, the more you watch, read, listen, the longer the list becomes….still it could be worse, there could be nothing at all worth reading, watching or listening to.

    • Totally! It’s like, will it ever end?! But you’re so right–we’re lucky to have an abundance of media to entertain ourselves with. Thanks for putting it into perspective, J.D. :)

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