Animals

I Am The Cat Whisperer


Recently, not one, but two people have asked me to watch their cats. I have an undeniable gift of making cats love me. People trust me with their cats because I’m basically a cat myself.

Whenever Paul and I walk through our neighborhood and pass a house with a cat in the yard, I bend down a coax the cat over to me. Sometimes Paul will lose faith and say “Oh, he wont come” but they always do! Cats always like a good rub. If you are willing to give them a good rub, they will love you.

Cats aren’t as talented with vocabulary as dogs are. They don’t recognize too many words and most of them scare easily. So if I see a cat, I’ll slow my roll, squat down, and say “Come here kitty kitty” in a really high pitched voice. This always works for me for some reason. I think cats prefer higher pitched noises. Take it from me, I’m the cat whisperer.

One time I met a cat in my neighborhood and I gave him a nice long rub. He rolled onto his belly on the sidewalk–it was pretty obvious that he was having an amazing time. When I was done massaging him I said “Okay bye” and started walking. He followed me for 3 blocks. I was like, “Umm okay BYE.” But there was no arguing with him. I gave him the most rubs ever. He finally stopped following me once he knew I wasn’t going to turn around again. So greedy!

I can easily relate to cats. I like to sleep. A lot. I like to eat. I don’t like getting wet. I judge people. I like when people do things for me. I like being pampered and getting massages. My Chinese Zodiac sign is the rabbit, but in Vietnamese is translates to cat. What I’m trying to say is that I’m basically a cat in a woman’s body.

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27 thoughts on “I Am The Cat Whisperer

  1. Cats! I love napping and eating, but I hate cats… MEH! I think we are going to have to agree to disagree on this. And I really am allergic, unlike when my children claim they’re allergic to vegetables…

    • Hah cats are not for everyone. They seem to have a bit of an attitude. And their fur gets everywhere so it makes sense why you don’t like them. They’re sweet when they’re little though. And then they grow up to be grouchy. Dogs are the best though. I can’t lie.

    • Hah yeah they have big personalities for such little creatures. They probably do blog in their dreams about how much they hate everything.

      Aww I love the kitten cam. Kittehs.

  2. I guess cats just really like you. 🙂 I got a couple cats to like me, even though I was a total stranger to them. I felt awesome afterwards, like I had cat super powers.
    Funny, this is the second post that I’ve read about cats today. Is it cat day and nobody told me? 😀

    • Yeah! It’s always a fun time to befriend furry creatures. That’s so weird, I know someone else who wrote a post about cats today too! It must be a weird wavelength that everyone is on…

  3. Pete Howorth says:

    They definitely prefer high pitched voices, I said “Ello Puss” is a deep manly Barry White voice and it ran away. But don’t be naive, cats understand things just fine. They’re just more defiant than dogs are.

    Have you not seen that cats and dogs movie?

    • No I haven’t seen that movie! I should probably give it a go though. Ello Puss hahah. I could so picture you saying that and the cat being like wtf. I feel like I could talk to my dog and he would know everything that I was saying and my cat literally had no clue what I was talking about. But maybe you’re right.

    • They do. They are able to take care of themselves way better than dogs. But I do like dogs too and I feel like dogs can understand words better and do cool tricks. 😀

  4. I get so tired of people dumping all over cats because they are not dogs. Dogs are great, but they are kind of dumb and dopey sometimes. No one has ever said a cat was dumb and dopey. They are probably evolutionarily superior to 95% of all animals.

    • I know! I’m a full animal lover so I basically love everything. I don’t understand how people can love one and not the other. Dogs can definitely be dopey and clueless. They also bark and get overly excited at times which can be annoying. Cats are pretty superior when it comes to taking care of themselves and being cool. They just have a cool factor that no other house pet can achieve.

  5. OMG! I want so much to use the word “catty” about you because it fits so darn well, but I will restraint myself in the interest of keeping good relations with my brothers and sisters to the North. In no way are you catty. Nope, not catty at all. HF

      • OMG WTF that’s so weird! But I’m glad you used it on my blog. Catty is a good way of describing me if we are saying that I’m cat-like. But it’s probably not a good way of describing me if you are sticking to the proper usage. I don’t think Canadians care about me as much as you would think!

  6. Recently stopped and rubbed the hell out of a stray cat in the parking lot of a hospice.
    I was going to take it home, but our delivery place was open so we ordered Chinese food instead.

  7. I’d type out things you should say to a cat to get them to come but it’s hard to phoenically spell “shukka shukka” or “spp spp spp spp spp” A lot of people think they’re cats or like to pretend to be cats. I’ve known more than one person which is far too many. What’s the deal cat whisperer? You’re the expert.

    • I think being a cat is a relaxing thing. Maybe they like the idea of being someone’s pet (which is gross and weird) but that’s probably the reason unfortunately. Maybe they want to be dependent on someone else? I saw an episode of My Strange Addiction and this woman liked to be a baby. She slept in an oversized crib and wore a diaper and everything. So very weird.

      I understood all of the words you typed out perfectly.

  8. Addie says:

    I love cats, as DC will attest, mostly because they don’t require much care. I don’t always use a kind voice, though–some days, I have to use my outside voice and say, “GET OFF THE EFFING COUNTERS!”

    I am, of course, ignored.

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  10. robpixaday says:

    Yes! Cats are very special. Whether we like them or not is irrelevant. It’s whether they find us useful or not. Cats let us love them and live with them, demand that we care for them, and then give us hairballs as presents.
    Dogs are OK, but I think they try a little too hard. A dog will lick your face just because it’s there. A cat will only lick your face if you fell head first into a can of Fancy Feast. Or he thinks you’re his mother and you’ve got mouse guts in your teeth.

    Loved this post!

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