School

My Carbon Footprint

Science was never my thing. And by “never my thing” I mean that I loathe it. Earth Science=rocks are dumb. Physics = velocity squared times I don’t care. Chemistry = Periodic Table of Death. Biology = the bane of my existence. I only failed one class during my college career and that was Bio. I re-took it and got a D-. I was clearly enthused about learning. Photosynthesis and cells and plant life are sooooooo boring. I have no time for that. However, I believe that my teacher initially failed me for one reason and one reason only–the size of my carbon footprint.

Me in every science class.

I have pretty big feet. And you know what big feet mean…big shoes! Hah yeah everyone makes that joke, but it’s somehow funnier when I say it, don’tcha think? My size 11 feet make pretty large footprints, so shouldn’t it make sense that my carbon footprint would be above average? It seems pretty straight forward.

My teacher made us take a quiz online to measure our carbon footprint. I printed mine out and brought it to class. I answered the questions as honestly as I could. Here’s an example of a question:

What energy sources do you use in your home? Check all that apply.

Electricity.

Natural gas, propane, or liquified petroleum gas.

Heating oil.

Wood burning biomass.

Being a completely normal person, I only checked electricity and moved on. I mean come on, heating oil? I’m not Amish. Wood burning biomass? WTF is that?

When I got my quiz results it said:

Ughghh really? This is the opposite of impressive. Maybe my teacher won’t judge me, I thought. Oh, she judged me alright. She judged me good and hard. I tried talking to her and I even pretended that I was interested in mitosis! But even my greatest brown-nosing failed me. I was disappointed for like 5 minutes and then I got over it. I realized that I am who I am and if that means I’m single handedly destroying our planet, then so be it.

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Food

Neapolitan, More Like Neapoopitan

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. Whoever invented Neapolitan ice cream is a total psycho. Turns out it’s those damn Italians. Well, just the ones from Naples. Neapolitan immigrants brought their awesome ice cream recipes to the cool side of the pond a.k.a. the new world a.k.a. the U.S.A. a.k.a. Italy is gross. I’m not saying Italians don’t know how to make delicious foods, because they definitely do. Gelato is amaze maze–I’m super grateful for whoever invented that. And remember in Eat Pray Love when Julia Robert’s character has an eating frenzy in Naples because the pizza tastes like heaven? She eats so much that her pants don’t fit. She would. However, Neapolitan ice cream is just downright wrong.

Okay, I’m gonna have to ask you to calm down about the pizza.

Apparently Neapolitan ice cream is a variation (almost an evolution) of spumoni. Let it be said that spumoni is good and Neapolitan isn’t. Have you ever been to a party where someone brings out the ice cream and it’s Neapolitan? It’s super lazy. The host thinks they’re being super creative by fulfilling everyone’s dessert wishes in one, but little do they know, no one wins when Neapolitan is served. It puts an immediate damper on all of the fun food times that everyone’s having. First of all, kids don’t know what Neapolitan is. They can barely pronounce the word. Hell, I can barely pronounce it. Strike one, Italians.

Secondly, people don’t always love chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry. Usually guests will favor only one of those flavors. And I can tell you right now it’s definitely not all of them mixed together. Neapolitan is basically served block style with the flavors packed in vertical strips. If you request vanilla, you’re going to get vanilla with a little bit of chocolate. If you want chocolate, expect some vanilla and strawb, and if you want strawberry, I hope you like chocolate covered strawberry ice cream! It’s an impossible task to get one flavor without getting a bit of another flavor in it.

Ice cream should not look like a brick.

The vanilla is always a neon yellow color. Like, a color that isn’t even found in nature. The strawberry stripe tastes like…not strawberry. It doesn’t even have strawberry chunks in it or anything! And chocolate ice cream always tastes like coffee to me, so I’m probably not the best judge for that one. Except I do enjoy a good old fashioned Frosty. R.I.P. Dave Thomas.

I hope that we can all agree that ice cream isn’t worth eating unless it’s delicious. I don’t want to waste my precious daily calorie intake on ice cream that tastes grody. I’d rather eat something that never gets old and has a cute name like Cookie Dough, or Baked Alaska, or Pralines and Cream. Not Neapolitan.

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Artwork, Feelings

Blowing My Mind

Have you ever thought about something so hard that it made your brain hurt? I love doing that. Thinking about things that are so great and so hard to comprehend. I started Bill Bryson’s “A Short History of Nearly Everything” last night and (If you haven’t read any Bill Bryson books, you’re pretty much wasting your life.) it made me think about how fleeting life is. He mentions how a human life is about 650,000 hours long. That doesn’t seem like that many hours, does it!?!? I thought I had more time than that.

The other night I was literally wowing myself thinking about how crazy it is that I’m a human being. I know it sounds super dumb. That’s one of the first things we learn when we’re little–I am a person. But really, think of all the other living things you could have been born as. I think everything has a spirit. I could have been born as a cat. But instead I’m able to think, have opinions, get dressed, laugh, make blog posts. I mean, it’s endless the things that we are able to do. Bill Bryson mentioned how we were all made up of atoms. Doesn’t that freak you out? It makes me want to huddle in the corner of the room and rock back and forth. Everything is made of atoms. Why do we know that? HOW do we know that? You can’t see atoms. How are humans so smart?

I read this last night and I loved it:

Not only have you been lucky enough to be attached since time immemorial to a favored evolutionary line, but you have also been extremely–make that miraculously–fortunate in your personal ancestry. Consider the fact that for 3.8 billion years, a period of time older than the Earth’s mountains and rivers and oceans, every one of your forebears on both sides has been attractive enough to find a mate, healthy enough to reproduce, and sufficiently blessed by fate and circumstances to live long enough to do so. Not one of your pertinent ancestors was squashed, devoured, drowned, starved, stranded, stuck fast, untimely wounded, or otherwise deflected from its life’s quest of delivering a tiny charge of genetic material to the right partner at the right moment in order to perpetuate the only possible sequence of hereditary combinations that could result–eventually, astoundingly, and all too briefly–in you.

It’s crazy to think about. I’m sure some people are like, yeah yeah, everyone on this planet is human–it’s not that crazy. BUT IT IS.

Have you ever been inside a Cathedral and marveled at it’s grandeur? Or been to a museum and stood in awe of brilliant works of art? It’s kind of amazing how things like that can make you feel so small. I remember feeling that way when I was in Venice right after I exited St. Mark’s Basilica. I can recall thinking, I’m in a city that’s floating on the water. WHAT IS LIFE?!

I browse online for cool stuff all the time. I’ve come across some truly wonderful discoveries, like this: Sand under a microscope.

When I first saw this, I almost cried. How have we been walking around, not knowing the beauty that was beneath our feet? It’s almost like it’s a joke. Everyone hates sand, but they don’t know how beautiful it really is. I know I sound super cheesy, but just look at it!

I was also wowed by this: Jason deCaires Taylor’s Underwater Sculptures.

He took sculptures to a whole new level. By allowing sea life to grow on them, adding color, and making his work even more beautiful and pure. Let’s be real, sculpting is one of the most difficult forms of art. My brain literally hurts when I think of artists chiseling away at what would be the material draped across a statue’s body. Taylor’s work adds another element. To see his work, you have to go beneath the surface. Imagine how quiet it is when you’re viewing them. Such an original and amazing idea.

And lastly, just consider our universe for a minute. Astronomer Geoffrey Marcy said, “They’re all on the same plane. They’re all going around in the same direction…It’s perfect you know. It’s gorgeous. It’s almost uncanny.” while describing the solar system. It’s too perfect to be just “a coincidence”. Did you know that there are as many stars as their are grains of sand? Just let that sink in for a minute. Did you also know that the light from stars that we see every night is thousands of years old and all of those stars are already gone? Mind blown.

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Food

All You Can Eat Taco Night

Paul and I had been dying to go to this restaurant’s All-You-Can-Eat Taco Night. It’s held every Monday and we finally remembered to go yesterday.

The establishment is called Pluto’s. I think it used to be a gas station once upon a time. Now it’s just a really weird purple building with neon lights. Their tag line is “The hottest food from the coolest planet” or something super clever like that. The food is decent, nothing amazing.

The one and only.

We’d eaten there once before and the record for most tacos devoured was 16. That’s not too bad, but nothing special either. I’m not really one to talk. I ended up only eating 6 tacos in all. But to be fair, I had burritos for lunch so I actually could have had maybe two more, which would have left me at a total of 8. We noticed that there was a new record to beat. Some kid ate 28 tacos. We inquired about him. The waitress said he was a short kid, maybe 20 or 21. He stayed for 3 hours eating tacos. Paul and I kind of felt like that was cheating. 3 hours is a long time. He might have even gone to the bathroom during that time, which would also be cheating in my book.

I really wanted Paul to beat that kid. I know he could have too, but by the time he got to his 20th taco, the restaurant was closed. He didn’t want to keep the waitress and staff there for that long, so we left. If we go back, I’m certain he can break the record. I just want the guy who ate 28 tacos to be really upset. YOUR TACO EATING WAS ALL IN VAIN.

Just to be clear, I had mine without cheese or sour cream because both of those items freak me out.

Have you ever been in an eating competition? How many tacos do you think you could eat? Should Paul go back and try to beat the record?

 

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Movies, TV

Adolescent Actors That Might Do Bigger and Better Things

When I was making this list, I started to realize that none of these gals are what I would call child actors. They seem to be young adults. In this modern time, actors and actresses must be believable no matter how old or young they are. No one cuts them slack just because they don’t have a lot of experience. For example, the actors in the brilliant show Full House were full of excuses. The Olsen twins could barely say their lines correctly, yet the world didn’t seem to mind because they were 10 months old. And no one seemed to mind that Uncle Joey (Dave Coulier) obviously had a severe mix of Down Syndrome and Tourettes. Anything would fly back then.

But now, now we’re in the market for serious performers. No excuses. No apologies. No justifications. The following is a list of youngsters that I believe will be the future of the Actors Guild of America.

Kiernan Shipka. Besides having one of the weirdest name ever, she’s one of the brightest stars around. For those of you who watch Mad Men, you know her as Sally Draper, daughter of Don and Betty. For those of you who don’t watch Mad Men, do you live under a rock? Stop reading blog posts and go catch up on the seasons you’ve missed. Sally is one of the best characters not only in Mad Men, but in television history. Kiernan plays her perfectly. I know she will go on to do bigger and better things.

Hailee Steinfeld. “They tell me you’re a man with true grit.” That’s the only line I remember her saying from the trailer. I never actually saw True Grit, but she looked awesome in it. Hailee also has a relatively normal name for someone in Hollywood. The moment when I knew Hailee would achieve greatness was when I saw her dress at the Academy Awards last year. What a cutie patootie! I’m not sure if she’s pretentious or if it’s just because she’s 15, but I feel like she’s a pretty confident person. However, if she becomes too confident, she will be transferred to my most hated celebs list. Be wary, Hailee.

Saoirse Ronan. Really? No normal person knows how to pronounce Saoirse. Apparently it’s SEER-shuh. Like, I get that you’re from Ireland, but just stop. But Saoirse really makes up in the talent department for what she lacks in the name department. Her resume includes big films like, Atonement, The Lovely Bones, Hanna, and The Way Back. I’ve only seen Atonement and Hanna, but I really liked both of them a lot. Hanna is pretty weird, but I never found myself bored. And Atonement is awesome. I definitely recommend that. According to IMDB, Saoirse has 4 movies coming out in 2013. Either her parents are slave drivers or….Nazis.

Chloe Grace Moretz. For some reason she has an umlaut above the ‘e’ in her name, and she also had to add her middle name into her title. What is it with these people? No one else is named Chloe Moretz. You don’t have to make it all fancy with your middle name. This isn’t facebook. Anyway, Chloe’s face kind of bothers me, but she seems like someone who will be a great actress eventually. I don’t think she’s on the same level as the others quite yet. But i respect her because she’s worked her way up unlike the aforementioned girls. Chloe did a lot of kids shows and voice overs. She’s been in movies that aren’t that popular. She was barely in 500 Days of Summer. My favorite movie of hers was Let Me In, a remake of the Swedish film Let The Right One In. A true vampire flick. I highly recommend both versions since the remake was basically a carbon copy. And now she’s in another vampire movie, Dark Shadows. Can we just wrap up the whole vampire thing now?

Can we all agree that she has a weird face?

Elle Fanning. Hopefully she’ll make it farther in life than her dumb sister Dakota. The only movie I remember seeing Elle in was Super 8 which wasn’t that good, but she definitely showed her acting skills. Apparently she was in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. I guess she wasn’t very memorable. Dakota must be pissed because her sister is climbing up the ladder faster than she did. The one thing that I don’t like about Elle Fanning is that she always smiles with her mouth closed. Someone must have told her that her teeth were gross and scarred her for life or something. Definitely look out for her in 2014 in Maleficentas Princess Aurora. (Maleficent is played by Angelina Jolie! Yessssssssssss.)

Always the pursed lips!

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Exercise, victoria b.c.

The Tweed Ride

I don’t even know where to begin with this one. About two weeks ago Paul and I were walking downtown. We were about to cross the street when a string of bicyclers soared in front of us. Typically I would have thrown my purse in the road hoping to trip all of them using a domino effect. But this time I was too transfixed to even attempt to cross, never mind cause them to crash.

All of the riders were casually biking, not racing. And they were dressed in what seemed to be 1920’s and 30’s British attire. All of the outfits looked so authentic. Not a bad one in sight, really. And everyone had a bit of tweed incorporated into their outfit as well.

I was really intrigued, watching them go by. I felt like I was on the set of a movie. Some people had their children on the back of their bikes and they were dressed up too! So much detail. One of the best bikers actually had a penny-farthing. I don’t know how he found it, but he looked awesome.

Yeeeah. I decided to find a picture because I know none of you knuckle-heads knew what I was talking about.

I guess the Tweed Ride started in London in 2009 and has been picked up throughout the world. It’s described as “a cosmopolitan ride with a bit of style.” Righto.

Usually I wouldn’t be interested in an activity that included exercise and public appearances. But for some reason I want to participate in it next year. I’ll have to start looking for an outfit. And a bike.

Congratulations Canada. This is the first cool thing I’ve seen in a while. Massive props.

Everyone in this video is super annoying and British, but you get the picture.

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Exercise

Note to Self: Running Stinks.

I don’t know why I insist on pretending that I’m athletic. For some reason I bought a volleyball last weekend. What am I going to do with a volleyball by myself? Nothing, that’s what. I also kind of ran a 10k last weekend. And by ran, I mean jog/walked. 10ks are really hard. They’re like, 6 miles of pure pain and wishing that things would end. I even prayed that there would be a Rapture just so I wouldn’t have to continue running.

Paul and his sister like to run. His sister recently participated in a 10k before I left for home. When I came back to Victoria, the weather was super nice and they wanted to jog around a lake that measured out to a 10k. I agreed to go with them, thinking I would just putz around and hopefully get tan. Paul told me that I should run until I felt like I was half way done with whatever amount that I wanted to run, and then turn around. He warned me that there was no way of getting back to where we parked unless I ran the whole thing or turned around. There wasn’t any shortcut. Unless I wanted to swim through the lake. No thanks.

I turned on my music and started to jog, as one does. Paul and his sister got farther and farther away until they were out of my sight. That’s when I held onto my key tightly, ya know, just in case anyone tried to rape me or anything. Keys are surprisingly great weapons. If someone attacks you, just jam it into their eyeball, or throat. That’s what I would do. Not that I’m a pro on getting raped or anything. When I was running, I played out a whole scenario in my head–someone knocking me down, me cutting up their face with my key, and then me kicking them in the head while they’re down. My parents think I should invest in some boxing classes because it seems like I need to get some aggression out. I have no idea what they’re talking about.

The good thing about using a key, is that you also have your rapist’s DNA. I’ve thought about this way too much.

A little bit into my run I saw a marker that said “6k”. I was so happy! Wow, I’m like, REALLY good at running 10ks! Maybe this is my thing. Paul and his sister will be so impressed with me! So I kept jogging. I slowed down a lot, but I kept it up. I saw the sign for “8k” and looked to my left. I could see the point where I started exactly across the lake. Hmm The lake must be longer on one side. I only have 2k left to run, it’ll be fine, I thought. At this point I was running in bursts. I would set little goals like, run to that tree, or run until this song finishes. And then I would allow myself little breaks.

I was getting super tired. Maybe 10ks weren’t for me. This course also offered a lot of obstacles. There were bikers, dogs, horses (!), horse poop, tree roots jutting out from the ground, etc. Oh and rapists, obviously. Eventually I reached a sign that said “10k”. Yes! After this last kilometer, I will be back to where I started. I decided to run without stopping. I wanted to have a strong finish! So I kept running and running and then I saw a sign that said “2k”. I felt like I was in the Twilight Zone. Was I trapped running around this lake for the rest of my life?! Did I take a wrong turn and end up at some other lake? My ipod was almost out of juice. This was not a good situation. My legs hurt every time I tried to make an effort to jog.

I eventually got back to where we parked. No one told me that we started at the 4k mark though. WOULD’VE BEEN SLIGHTLY HELPFUL. I figured that Paul and company would have sent out a rescue squad since I’d been gone for an hour and twenty minutes. Not a bad 10k time considering I walked a lot of it! I saw Paul and his sister walking to the car. Did I finish at the same time as them? Am I a better runner than I thought? Nope. Paul sprained his ankle trying to avoid a drain that was jutting out of the ground. When he stepped around it, his foot landed in a ditch. He hobbled the last 2k of the loop and he still beat me.

Side note: There was a race going on while we were running. Not just a normal race though, an “Ultra Race”. Competitors would run around the lake 8 times. That’s an 80k. Which converts to 49.7 miles. There’s no one that I hate more than the people that would pass me, sprinting around the lake for their 8th time.

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Animals, Exercise, Judging, victoria b.c.

Strange Characters

I feel like I’m an observant person. Since moving to Victoria, I’ve seen some pretty colorful folks. Some of them I see every day! Or at least once a week. These “characters” set the scene in my normal, everyday life in Victoria. It’s like I’m Belle from Beauty and the Beast, “There goes the baker with his tray like always–the same old bread and rolls to sell. Every morning just the same, since the morning that we came to this poor Provincial town…” I guess our town isn’t poor, but it is part of a province! I can relate to Beauty and the Beast¬†on a whole new level now.

But seriously. Where’s the baker? I’m starving.

Lets start with Crazy Dachshund Guy. This guy has 3 dachshunds and he walks them all at the same time. Thus making him “crazy”. He’s pretty hard to miss. He never trips over his pups. It’s surprising how graceful he is, really. I would never own a dachshund solely because I cannot, for the love of all that is holy, figure out how to pronounce the word dachshund. I usually say docks-hund really fast and hope that no one calls me out on it. Apparently it’s pronounced dahks-huunt. I guess I’m not that far off. It still gives me anxiety so I just call them wiener dogs and hope that I don’t offend anyone. Plus, I get the pleasure of bringing the word wiener into the conversation.

The Moka House Coffee Crew and The Starbucks Coffee Crew. I’m referring to the people who sit outside of these coffee shops and people watch. I’m almost certain that these people have no jobs. They will eyeball you for the duration that it takes to walk past each establishment. We all know Starbucks is a chain that everyone loves. People at SBucks love to judge. People at Moka House are even worse. They want people to see them judging you. At least people at Starbucks are secretive…kinda. Basically, in Victoria you’re either a Moka House-r or a Starbucks-er. I play both sides. Can’t everyone just get along? Moka House is definitely the worst though because they have an awning to sit under and judge passersby even when it’s raining. You can’t beat that.

Schizophrenic “The World Is Ending” Guy. Twice a week this guy stands on the corner of our street covered in signs that casually mention the Earth being melted by lava. Where is this lava coming from? All of his signs have to do with either fire or lava. I think he does a lot of research because he always cites a Bible verse at the bottom of each one. “The Universe will be engulfed in flames. John 10 :2″ Ummm, Crazy Face? I’m pretty sure John didn’t say that. He shouts at cars a lot. Whenever I see him , I make sure to walk to the other side of the street. If I didn’t, I’d probably end up getting in a Bible fight with him. Which would consist of me, throwing a Bible at his head.

“I’ll show you fire” Leviticus 21:5

Prance-y Jogger Guy/Girl. There’s this jogger that literally trots around like he’s a Lipizzan stallion. I’m 75% sure it’s a guy. Short hair, petite, really tan. It could go either way. Let’s just pretend it’s a guy because it’s funnier that way. He prances a lot. I study his method whenever I see him “jogging”. And by study, I mean that I drop whatever I’m doing and literally stare him down. It’s fascinating. Paul and I have tried to re-create the majestic way in which he dances along, but it cannot be copied. It’s almost too perfect. Also, it seems to work as a really good weight loss program since this guy has little to no body fat. I would try his approach, but I have this thing called dignity. And not to mention a reputation to uphold.

Those are just some of the characters that I see everyday. It’s perfectly normal to be jealous of my life.

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Feelings

Preppy: A Lifestyle Part 1

When thinking about the word “prep” a number of things can come to mind. Nice clothes, country clubs memberships. yachts, ski vacations, madris and seersucker, ivy league schools, etc. But it’s so much more than that! Take it from me, someone who has fooled hundreds of my pupils into thinking I’m pretty preppy by taking shortcuts, pretending I have good taste, and acting exclusive. Can one act exclusive? I guess it’s just a nice way of saying that instead of acting like I hated everyone, I just acted like I was above them. Was I snotty? Yes. Am I still? Don’t answer that.

Here to relieve you of all your questions about preppy-ism, I have “The Official Preppy Handbook” as a guide. I obtained the 1980 edition, so maybe some things have changed since then, but I’m pretty sure being preppy is all about tradition. So this is as vintage as I could get. I’m almost certain there’s an earlier version that Ralph Lauren keeps in the back of his closet and prays to every night.

Invest in Ralph for true prep attire.

Let’s start with The Rights of Birthright: The Family. Everything starts here. For most of us it never actually starts because our families are poor and retarded. None of our parents went to great schools, and their parents went to even worse schools. Something interesting about preppy families is that everyone has their official familial title. For example, I would be Aunt Lily if my brother had a child. Or if we were talking about my mom’s sister’s child, I would refer to her as Cousin Buffy (I don’t have a cousin Buffy. That would be ultra-creep). My mom always did this. She would call people Cousin so-and-so, or Uncle this-and-that. Can’t you just call them by their name? Speaking of names, if you want to guarantee that your child is a preppy, name them a name that you would only call a pet. Biffy, Kitty, Teeny, Duke, Muffy, Barbie, Bitsy, Bunny, Corky, Rocky, Chip, Kip, Trip, Skip. Basically, any name that shouldn’t be a name.

Of Mahogany and Macrame. If You had the following items in your house growing up, you were probably raised to be a preppy: Upholstered pieces covered with flowered chintz, many small and worn oriental rugs, prints of dogs, ducks, horses, boats or birds, antiques bought at an auction, museum documented eighteenth century wallpaper, lots of old table lamps, mahogany and brass, pastel sketches of the children, portraits of ancestors, fireplace equipment, ship models and nautical memorabilia, Georgian paneling, dishes of beach glass.

If you had any of these items, your family was the opposite of preppy: vinyl protectors, wall-to-wall rugs, abstract art, Louis-the-anything furniture, flocked wallpaper, indirect, spot or track lighting, chrome and glass, macrame, Hummel figurines, dirt, Masonite paneling, dishes of candy. I’m so sorry if this was your life. I’m crying a single tear for you as I type.

If you want to make your house preppy and you don’t have the money or good taste, just remember that nothing should look like you tried hard, yet everything should flow. Always go with a beach or cottage theme (those are safest and easiest) or Shabby Chic. Throw some Town & Country magazines around and call it a day. You’re welcome.

Keepers of the Flame: Status Quo Institutions. If your parents didn’t force you into any sport or activity, count your blessings. Being lazy is the best, am I right?! But for prep standards, it’s the mark of the devil. Preppy activities include: piano lessons (or any classical instrument), ballet, horse riding, French lessons, tennis (think country club sports), golf, sailing, etc. Summer camp can also be considered a preppy activity. I went to an all-girls camp, which basically means that it wasn’t any fun. I joined swim team (semi-preppy?) and sang in choir. I had people fooled into thinking I liked doing things.

Couldn’t you picture them on a rowing team?

Regulating the Cash Flow: Well-to-Do’s and Don’ts.

1. Your money is handled by a trustee until you reach your twenties. That always seems like an appropriate age to give your children all of their money. The age where they make even worse decisions than when they were in high school. It’s imperative that you make your trustee think that you’re a capable human being. Agree to everything he says and make sure he pays if he takes you out to lunch so he knows that you can handle your money well. These are all tricks of the trade, my friends.

2. Give to charities that will list your name as a sponsor.

3. Spend money on important things, but use thrift for insignificant items. It’s a fine balance.

4. Be slightly careless with your money. “Forget how much cash you have with you, for instance–it helps give the impression that you don’t think too much about money.”

5. Never carry cash. “Borrow or charge.” Borrow? Wouldn’t borrowing make you seem super poor? I wouldn’t suggest borrowing. Being in debt of others is uncomfortable, and frankly, gross.

6. Never replace anything until you’ve exhausted all possibility of ¬†repair, restoration, or rehabilitation.

7. Pick up small tabs. People will remember your generosity, but not the amount. Allow them to pick up the lavish dinners and what not.

8. Don’t say wealthy. Say rich.

A Preppy Value System:

Consistency

Nonchalance

Charm

Drinking

Effortlessness

Athleticism

Discipline

Public Spiritedness

So spirited!

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