Driving, Feelings, Food

Morning Time


Pretty, but not worth the pain of waking up.

You know that saying, “Nothing good ever happens after midnight”? Well, I think nothing good ever happens before 9 AM. Mornings are not my friend. Not because I’m cranky….okay yes, because I’m cranky. Waking up is just so painful.

My morning routine consists of: opening my eyes, closing my eyes again and then trying to fall back asleep. If that doesn’t work, I grab my computer and sit in bed for around an hour until I feel like getting out of my cocoon of warmth. I’m sure you think I’m really lazy, but I actually lead a very productive life. I keep our place clean and smelling delightful, I cook, I workout and I babysit twice a week. If I didn’t just describe your dream woman, then you’re most likely a lesbian.

The most annoying thing about this morning was that my alarm wouldn’t turn off. This had never happened before so my first rational thought was that my phone was possessed. I turned the entire thing off to insure that the demon inside would flee–preferably into the woman who lives across the hall, but I really can’t afford to be picky.

I had to drive (technically Paul drove) Paul to the airport so he could go take an exam in Vancouver. We’re so worldly. We left the house at 6:15 AM. It was so dark and morning-y outside. It smelled like morning. I hate that. The car was cold when we got inside. Granted, its January in Canada, but still. I hate getting in cold cars. Don’t we have enough geniuses in the world to make a car that warms up in under a minute? Or do I have to patent every invention myself?

Another thing that you have to deal with in the morning is traffic. I’ve come to the conclusion that people who drive places in the early morning are all shady characters. I looked in everyone’s windows and no one looked normal. I probably looked the least normal since I was busy staring at everyone, but still.

At the airport, I got a breakfast burrito, no cheese. They messed up my order–there was some weird cheese sauce in it. Paul said it was dressing, but seriously, who puts dressing in a breakfast burrito? Chefs purposely get food orders wrong in the morning because they think people are half-asleep and won’t know the difference if they experiment with dressing in breakfast burritos. But you know what? I noticed. Don’t try pulling a fast one on me, buddy. JUST DON’T.

The only good thing about this morning was that I saw the sunrise. It was gorgeous. I came thisclose to getting in car crashes whilst admiring the solar beauty. It was great, but not as great as going back to bed is going to be.

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17 thoughts on “Morning Time

  1. Ah, Lily Lily Lily.

    You are quite well-travelled these days. You must have blessed at least half of the Western world with a hatred of one kind or another by now.

    Well done and please carry on.

  2. hahaha! Funny stuff in this one! “Or do I have to patent every invention myself?” haha!
    I can just picture you feeling so out of sorts, dying to crawl back into your “cocoon of warmth.”
    I would have to say ‘after midnight’ people are way more shady than morning people. Unless of course, the morning people ARE the late night people who never went to bed! They would be the worst group of all, freaks of nature. People who only need 4 hours of sleep are aliens.

  3. Mornings are not ment to experience while conscious. I know, I know. I can’t even remember the last time I woke up happily, ready to rise. I’m just no human being before 9.30. I share your pain.

    • Yeah, I think you’re right. There should be some medicine that humans are allowed to take that turn us into zombies before noon so that we don’t have to experience the morning. But we can still do things. None of that makes sense.

  4. I have to wake up at 6:30 in the morning tommorrow for work because I have to come in early and traffic is so bad….blah blah blah I’m relating I’m relating I’m relating.

    Your day sounds like you’re going to grow up to be the mom on Modern Family. For someone who doesn’t earn an income and has kids who pretty much take care of themselves, she complains a lot.

    • She complains the most. She’s always angry and doesn’t realize how cute and funny her husband is. And shes an unrealistically skinny mom. No one who has 3 kids is skinny. At least not in my world.
      But yeah, I can find a way to complain about anything. It’s a gift. But I’m still going to blame my inner Jew.
      And as for you waking up at 6:30, at least you can take solace in the fact that people like you enough to hire you.

  5. Lol I think it’s great how you just hop on a plane to go take an exam. I travel on a plane about once every two years. Mornings do suck though, which is why being Assistant Sales Manager on a big company is so great, my hours consist of 12:30pm to 9pm so no early mornings for me anymore :D

    • Hah we live luxurious lives over here, my friend. Jk–the ferries were canceled, so he had no other choice. Well, I mean, he could have swam.
      Sounds like you have some good hours with your new job! Ideal living.

  6. I, too, am NOT a morning person. However, there is this little gal in the room over that IS. I cannot sleep past 8:30 am in this house. Unless she’s with grandma for the weekend (that just happened and I slept to 11 am and It. Was. Glorious.

    I just can’t make myself go to bed at a reasonable hour. Last night I tried going to bed at 8 b/c I felt like craptown and I ended up falling asleep at 11:30. I heart sleep…

    • Sleeping until 11 is the best feeling. I hate when I can’t get to bed at a reasonable hour, even though I want to. Life struggles.
      I don’t know how I’ll be able to deal with having to wake up early when I have kids. Sounds like every kind of torture.

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